Monthly Archives: October 2003

Ahh, Halloween the night when kiddies (and grown ups) run around in costumes trick or treating and egging anything that moves. I think I’ll be having a scary movie night, eating lots of candy and scaring myself sounds fun. I’ve decided that because it’s Halloween my evil-o-meter should hit 100% for the first time ever, to celebrate the evilness of the day. What are you doing for Halloween, and what are you dressing up as?

Over the past few months I’ve been slowly changing over my blogging software from Greymatter, to B2, and then upgrading to WordPress. So now I just have to re-do everything again. I’m sorry about all the broken links around the place, kitta.net feels like a geocites site right now. All will be good soon and the evil broken links will be gone.

On a good note, my bandwidth mysteriously dropped on the 20th. No idea why it did, maybe I did something like moved a file or protected a file that was being whored. I mean, 6 GB to about 2 GB a day is a big drop for my little site.

Maybe it’s just me, but every time I hear ‘Rise Up’ – sung by the Australia idol finalists – I am reminded of The Simpsons. Remember that episode where Bart and his friends are in a boy band? The one with n-sync making themselves look like wankers? Well, the song Bart and his band mates sing (no idea what it was called) reminds me of ‘Rise Up’. I always get this image in my head of the aussie idols in the jet planes, flying around singing and bombing things, just like Bart and his friends did in their video clip. Weird hey.

I’m listening to possibly the worst radio show ever. A local radio station 92.9 has let guy called Lukey take over the Thursday night late shift, he also has a sidekick which is a computer generated voice. Yes, a computer generated voice. If a family member has ever installed that annoying bonzi buddy program while you weren’t looking, you’ll know what I’m talking about. The kind of computer generated voice that in 2000 was so cool, for about 10 minutes, then it just became annoying.

The really sad thing is that I either listen to this or watch ‘The Bachelorette’.

Did you know…

That you can ask for complimentary water at McDonalds so long as you order something? My friend did it yesterday. At first, I thought she was just taking the piss, but they gave her the water in a cup, with ice, a straw and without question or an evil ‘one day I’ll hurt you badly’ glare. Not only that, they gave her it in one of those ‘flip and win’ cups that are apart of their promotion right now.

I must try and use this information for good and not evil.

I ate chinese food from that place. That place that sells the tasty fried rice, vegetable dish and sweet and sour pork. It made me made sick (no not MSG sick, food poisoning sick), and I was up till 6am in pain, being forced to watch people rave about exercise equipment and sharp knifes. I don’t understand myself sometimes, why do I keep ordering food from there when it makes me so sick? I’m like a drug addict that keeps going back to the dodgy dealer that sells some bad stuff. I know it’ll feel good at first, but later I’ll be buggered.

I’ve told my mother that if she sees me eating any of that places food again she it to take away my fork and attack me with it until I give up the evil, evil food.

So I’ve been in bed today, catching up on sleep and watching Oprah ramble on about brides with post-wedding depression. “Once the fairy tale wedding is over, reality hits.”You don’t say? I loved it when the lady said “there’s a wedding devil that takes over…you become like bride-zilla.” Classic.

My boys have released hip nite today, which is a hip new web design company (and which makes me feel oh so hip while blogging about it).

Taylor has once again got me addicted to something (he’s like my dealer, first it was RSS, then various websites, now this). He’s got me addicted to grouphug.us, which is a website where people anonymously confess some of their deepest thoughts and secrets. When you read through some of the confessions, it makes you think “I’m glad I’m not the only one.” As always, there are a few confessions that seem a bit odd and funny…

“I tried to do the Mary Poppins umbrella bit off of my roof once. Trust me, it is not worth being stranded in a tree all day.”

“I occasionally think i may be a toaster….My wife left me because of this….Fat BITCH”

“I don’t want a kid. Some people say they don’t want to bring a child into this world, as if there’s something wrong with the world…I don’t feel any of that, the world is okay. I’m just really lazy.”

“I’ve played over 1700 games of free cell while i was supposed to be working. I once played 30 in a row without losing. It’s a sick obsession.”

“I live behind a liposuction/plastic surgery clinic. I once stole the bags of fat from the bio-waste dumpster (I got the idea from fight club) and excreted the oil from the fat. I then dumped a thermos full of it into the fryer machine at the McDonalds where i work.”

“I taught a group of 6th graders while tripping on acid. On my way home I was pulled over, neither the other teachers or the cop knew, but the 6th graders kept telling me that I was acting funny.”

I will never be able to eat some macca’s fries without thinking liposuction. Go confess your secrets.

This is the song I’ve had in my head all day long (Song is to the tune of ‘land down under’ by men at work)…

I come from the land of chunder
Where rivers flow full of chunder
Can’t ya hear, can’t ya hear, chunderrrrrrr
Ya’ better run, ya’ better take coverrrrrr

I don’t know if I’ve heard it somewhere before or if I made it up, all I know is it popped into my head this morning while I was in the shower and it has been on my mind all day. My mind is a strange place full of html, songs about chunder and oprah show dreams.

Anyways, over the last few days I’ve been setting up a new forum. I decided to put one up because I was bored and felt like doing something else besides moving furniture all day. Yes, I’ve had a forum before and I ended up killing it with a cyber axe, but hopefully this one will live to be a middle aged or old forum… Imagine it, the forum will be looking for its cyber cane to hit spammers with, telling a lot of “in my day” stories while trying to find its cyber teeth.

Have you ever noticed how I go completely off topic and start rambling about odd things all the time?

To: Kitta
Subject: Need Dimensional Warp Generator

Hello,
I’m a time traveler stuck here in 2003. Since nobody here seems to be able to get me what I need (safely here to me), I will have to build a simple time travel circut to get where I need myself. I am going to need an easy to follow picture diagram for a simple time travel circut, which can be built out of (readily available) parts here in 2003. Please email me any schematics you have. I will pay good money for anything you send me I can use Or if you have the rechargeable AMD dimensional warp generator wrist watch unit available, and are 100% certain you have a (secure) means of delivering it to me please also reply. Thank You.

There is nothing I could possibly write to make the above more funny than it already is, so I shall leave it be.

It’s the small things that amuse me. Like today, I was at starkdavingmad.com reading an entry about this little trick…

• While sitting on a chair, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles.
• Now, while doing this, draw the number 6 in the air with your right hand.
• Your foot will now change direction.

Try it, it’s freaky, and I promise you that 30 minutes will go by while you yell and swear at your right foot to stop changing directions. I told you small things amuse me.