My Confession

Taylor has once again got me addicted to something (he’s like my dealer, first it was RSS, then various websites, now this). He’s got me addicted to grouphug.us, which is a website where people anonymously confess some of their deepest thoughts and secrets. When you read through some of the confessions, it makes you think “I’m glad I’m not the only one.” As always, there are a few confessions that seem a bit odd and funny…

“I tried to do the Mary Poppins umbrella bit off of my roof once. Trust me, it is not worth being stranded in a tree all day.”

“I occasionally think i may be a toaster….My wife left me because of this….Fat BITCH”

“I don’t want a kid. Some people say they don’t want to bring a child into this world, as if there’s something wrong with the world…I don’t feel any of that, the world is okay. I’m just really lazy.”

“I’ve played over 1700 games of free cell while i was supposed to be working. I once played 30 in a row without losing. It’s a sick obsession.”

“I live behind a liposuction/plastic surgery clinic. I once stole the bags of fat from the bio-waste dumpster (I got the idea from fight club) and excreted the oil from the fat. I then dumped a thermos full of it into the fryer machine at the McDonalds where i work.”

“I taught a group of 6th graders while tripping on acid. On my way home I was pulled over, neither the other teachers or the cop knew, but the 6th graders kept telling me that I was acting funny.”

I will never be able to eat some macca’s fries without thinking liposuction. Go confess your secrets.

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