Something very strange and mystical has been happening to me lately. For the last few months I have had a radio present in my bathroom so I can listen to the radio while I have a shower, and every time I turn on the radio to have a shower a Nickleback song is playing.
Every. Single. Time.
Different variables do not matter; times of day, radio station, (Nova, 92.9, 96fm, CoastFM, I swear even Triple J has forsaken me) none change the outcome. The Nickleback monster always intrudes upon my shower just as I lather my shampoo.
Do I take this as a sign? I don’t know. Is the radio cursed by a voodoo priest that prays to the Nickleback gods? Maybe. Are tiny little trolls that live inside my radio trying to turn me into a Nickleback loving zombie? Possibly. Is Nickleback paying Perth radio stations thousands of dollars to ruin my showering experience? Totally. Will I get indexed on Google under ‘Nickleback Zombies’? Fuck yeah.
All I know is that if I hear one more Nickleback song I’m going to smash the radio (and it’s trolls) into tiny little bits, then put the bits into a container and attach lead weights to it and let it corrode at the bottom of the ocean.
Then we shall see who has their pants around their feet!