The Old Lady

I sat in the sun in a park today, throwing Camp a ball for her to fetch in an attempt to tire her out and give her some daily exercise, go fetch required the least amount of effort from my body that is currently stricken with a lingering cold.

I saw a little girl approaching to my left, she was dressed in plastic pink kitten heels and carried a black beaded evening bag, she asked me “is you’re dog friendly?” and before I could reply Camp was giving her a welcoming lick, I smiled and replied “yes, she loves meeting new people”. She patted Camp as she talked about her own dog, she then asked if she could play with Camp for a bit, I said for her to go nuts and laid on the grass soaking up the late afternoon sun. A few minutes passed and I said it was time for Camp and I to go home to start dinner. She turned and looked at me and asked “which school do your kids go to?”

I wanted to say “I’m only 22!” in disgust or “my kids are in college” as a joke, “I don’t have any kids” I told her with a laugh – she seemed amazed by my answer. She strutted over the road towards her home with her evening bag glistening in the sun, her mother asked her where she had been, “the nice old lady let me play with her doggy” she replied.

The old lady.

When did I become a lady?
When did I become old?
When did I start looking like I have given birth multiple times?
Do I look overly motherly?
Are wrinkles appearing already?
Is my hair a motherly shade of brown?
Does Camp look like a dog owned by someone who has borne children?

Twenty two does not maketh an old lady.

22 Comments on “The Old Lady”

  1. Heh, I think you should take it as a compliment – young children look at things and people differently than grown ups. It could just be that she had recognized a certain level of maturity in you, and that can’t be a bad thing, right? ๐Ÿ˜‰


  2. 22 is physically old — no, not today. Mentally, that can vary person to person. I realized I was old just about two months before I turned 22, after thinking how much my life has changed since I was a kid and how today’s generations are going to grow up in a much different culture. That’s when I really understood the generation gap, and I got so mad about feeling old at such a physically young age. I made a whole blog post about this point.


  3. Long time reader, first time poster.

    The girl I used to babysit for told me once that my arms were real hairy — just like her daddy’s! Isn’t that precious.

    Your little red monkey just told me the funniest thing. I laughed. Hard.


  4. Well, if you lookat it as you are close to a quarter of a century old, maybe… No, lets just leave it to a childs view on things. Yeah, thats it.


  5. Hmm… A four-lettered abbr. comes to mind, starting with M.

    Reminds me of when I overheard a little boy asking his mother what gender I was. I got a haircut and moved on. Kids say the… Ah f*ck it. Children should be seen, not heard. =P


  6. When I was in high school, my friends and I used to think that 30 was sooooo old. We were of the idea that age went thus: 19, 20, 21, old, coma, dead. I’m now 28 years old, and still get a buzz if bouncers at the local clubs ask me for my ID. ๐Ÿ™‚


  7. Arnor.. You may be thinking of an acronym, not an abbreviation. Not that I have the slightest idea, what you’re going on about.

    Don’t worry Kitta. I had the same thing a couple of years ago when a mother told her two children to stop bothering “that nice man” at a shopping centre.

    Soon after that I started reffering to anyone more than 5 years younger than me as “damn pesky kids” (Although at the time, I was dressed the headless horseman, trying to frighten people away from an abandoned gold mine.)


  8. When people ask for my age they usually look shocked after I tell them, and follow it up with “Wow… life hasn’t been good to you, eh?”

    I usually follow it up with “fuck you”.


  9. I would hardly count someone who mixes pink kitten heels and a black sequined handbag’s expert opinion on such matters. They so clash. She probably thinks ponies and pink tutus are the shiznit too.


  10. Long time reader, first comment.

    You probably didn’t even look old to her. You were just big, like her parents so she assumed you were a mommy. Little people think differently, and they don’t think before they speak.


  11. In the time it takes you to blink your eyes you’ll be 32, then 42, and so on. It’s not fair but it’s true.
    You’re still our favorite “Old Lady.” ๐Ÿ™‚


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