I finally went for an eye exam after months and months of procrastination and blurriness. I ended up ordering new pair for long distance and having my old frames fitted with new lenses for reading. My health insurance didn’t go through at the store the first time, it said ‘health fund down’, I imagined my health fund to be wounded in battle and asking the doctor to tell his wife he loves her and little Timmy… Tell Timmy he will grow up to be a fine young man, a fine young man indeed.


I had told the optometrist that I used a computer quite a bit and I felt that it was putting strain on my eyes, thus the reading glasses to relax my eyes were prescribed. After the eye exam I was dumped with a talkative young woman whom I was told would sort out my eyewear needs, she read my eye exam card and asked me what I did on computers. I paused, contemplated saying “why looking at foot porn of course, what else does one do with high speed internet?”, and then replied with a sensible answer of “mainly web design”. I could have said blogging, but I tend to shy away from that reply, as I have found that it takes a copious amount of time to even explain what word ‘blog’ means without confusing the subject enquiring and wanting to kill myself for mentioning it in the first place. “Wow web design, that must be hard, how do you learn that?” she said with hint of amazement, “self taught” I responded, “Wow” she said with even more amazement. Then she said it, the thing computer illiterate people always ask anyone who show the slightest knowledge regarding computers, “Can you hack into computers and, like, read peoples email?” she enquired, and shortly after the words came out of her mouth they were accompanied by an evil ‘I have this ex…’ look in her eye. “No, sorry” I replied with a laugh, dashing any chance of her finding out what her ex was up to these days. “Oh” she said with a sigh, followed moments later by “Ok then, let’s talk glasses”.

And we did, I spent all up $600 on said glasses, luckily my health insurance finally went through and paid for half. Being able to see is fun, I highly recommend it.

18 Comments on “HaX0r”

  1. It’s been a marked change here with the rise of CNN and everyone talking to bloggers. Saying that I blog will get a reaction, hence I avoid it. Most people ask me if I can fix their computer, to which I almost always say no, because if I fix it once, well, they come to me for everything. So I flat out refuse, unless I have a familial or very close friendship relationship. Most have stopped asking me if I can break into e-mail. (And now that my wife is going into SIGINT, they assume I’ll be able to read it anyway.)

    I love being self-taught, and that is so much fun. You can impress people by knowing things, but they don’t know what you know. Of course, getting work permits in other countries can be a bit of a pain, but that’s ok. It’s worth it.


  2. I love how the computer illiterate are completely in awe of anyone who can do more than go online, check their email and type a report in Word and suddenly think you can do ANYTHING with computers because you know more than they do.

    Actually, no, I don’t love that. I hate that. It’s annoying.


  3. I recently purchased a 19″ LCD, they are a lot easier on the eyes, and the prices are going down all the time. Mine was just over $200 us. Sure made my computer viewing more pleasurable.


  4. I get that hacker question every time I say what I do. Well. Either blank stares, or the question.

    Sometimes I like to play with their furry little minds. It turns out everyone looks at porn. Use this fact to your advantage.


  5. Seeing is good, but I’d like to know why you got ‘relaxation’ glasses and I got told off by some old optometrist git that I was an idiot for self prescribing same and to take a hike.

    Now that I can’t see closer than my elbow, I got some last month and I can read again.

    I don’t know why I didn’t come across this blog years ago, one page and I’m already LMAO.

    Perth is where all the talent is, of course…


  6. I switched from glasses with eye-strain relieving filter for monitors to contacts, because a) I prefer the look without glasses (plus it has a lot of benefits in my life, not looks-related) and b) I no longer use CRT monitors, so I don’t really feel a strain to begin with anymore.


  7. Are those the glasses you got? They’re so freakin’ popular. On one hand, I feel good for getting them, but then on another, I’m like, “ahh, everyone has these!”


  8. That is SO my complaint about movies, Kitta. I think the people who write them are actually using paper, because in virtually all blockbusters, anyone who can use the internet can also hack into the Pentagon or disable satellite missiles.


  9. Somewhere out there a gaunt looking healthfund is languishing in a POW camp with a wrist-watch stuck up its ass for Timmy.


  10. I get the hacking question all the time. This one girl wanted me to crash her ex’s computer and hack into myspace…. “No i can’t do that” “Ohh… but your so smart, I bet you can figure it out…”


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