Dear Santa

Dear Santa,

I have decided to blog my Christmas wish list this year. Paper is so not the cool thing to do, and I’m sure since you’re such a hip dude you’d have a feed reader and check it daily for updates on my blog. So, I present you now with a list of things I would like for Christmas from you. And if my family and friends just happen to read this, then they can also take note of this list. Oh, and before you check that list of your’s, I can tell you now it’ll say I’ve been good, because unlike the little red monkey, I don’t plot world domination daily. Here is my list:

Sincerely,
Nikita (The good one)

Dear Santa Dude,

I saw kitta typing a Christmas list and I wanted to also blog mine. Oh and if you do check that big list don’t take notice of the huge red letters saying ‘evil’, ‘bad’ or ‘whatever you do don’t go near him’. It’s just a joke those elves are playing, the little bastards, I told them I’d kick their happy little asses if they said anything about me. I’d also like to point out I only rarely plot world domination and I’m going to WDA (world dominators anonymous) meetings to cope with the evilness that grows within me. Now onto my list:

  • My own website so I don’t have to put up with all this kitta.net shit, I mean hello, I am the most loved one here. It should be littleredmonkey.net.
  • A little red car.
  • My own planet – because this one is just so bloody hard to dominate.
  • My face on a coke bottle – Just to piss of kitta.

Sincerely,
Red Monkey (The one that will bite you if you don’t give me what I want)

10 Comments on “Dear Santa

  1. HO HO HO… Merry Christmas!
    Kitta:
    Hello little girl, my you are a sweet one. I saw your wish list but unfortuantely Mrs. Clause came over before I had a chance to take a closer look at that cam shot of yours. That !%$^, never let’s me have any fun. I understand you have been a very good girl, atleast online but what Santa wants to know is how bad you have have really been. Be very, VERY descriptive. The more accurate you are, the more presents you will get from your wish list. After all Santa has a very special place in his heart (shaped bed) for you. I was checking my good-bad list this morning and saw that your name had been cut out, don’t worry, I put it back in. I am sure it was that Elf-Banger Mrs. Clause. She got real pissed when I pasted that enlarged printout of your cam shot over our bed. That woman just can’t enjoy the ride.

    I hear her coming now, so I will have to go. Rmember lots of details about your “bad deeds” sent with high-importance to my email and your wish will come true.

    The big jolly man on top,

    Santa

    Little Red Monkey:

    I will try my best to give you a helping hand. I know how hard it can be to take over this world. After all, that is what flying around and trying to buy every one off with presents was suppose to do but it got all twisted around and now I am stuck handing out presents to little brats every year. How do you think this suit got to be red? I had to take out some of the people that stood in my way after all.

    I talked to the elves about you and they said you remind them a lot of me before my spirit was borken by the Mrs.
    The little red car is being fedexed to you right now(tracking# 1526400666) as a sort of “your scratch my back and I will scratch yours” deal (read the above note for details). I figure you would have the inside track on that little hottie Kitta. But a new planet, shit, I should have thought of that.

    Good luck with the world domination bit and don’t let any of those stuck up little pricks at WDA talk you out of it. It’s great work if you can get it.

    Keep in touch.

    The angry fat man with the blood stained suit.

    Santa

    By the way, let me know if you want to team up in the world domination scheme. I am ready to get back into it and I am sure I can get those attack reindeer of mine back into shape.

  2. Hope Santa gives the little red monkey Mars, that way there’ll be summit for the NASA and british guys to see when that thing lands on christmas day! Imagine that, life exists on mars and it’s a little red monkey with a passion for coke

  3. well Kitta you’re not expecting much hey? šŸ™‚ Although, come to think of it, I’d write down everything possible in my letters as a kid, and hopefully pick up one or two…

    al

  4. Wow, you’re really horny this year, hey Santa?

    And al, I did that thing where I was just going to list a few things, then went nuts. ?:/

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: