Registered the domain and started my blog today!

How to Tell if Your Dog's an Alcoholic

If your family dog has been acting strange lately, it’s possible your beloved pooch has been hitting the hooch! Dr. Kyle Blamonte, an animal addiction specialist, says the problem of drunken doggies has been growing at an alarming rate. “It starts off with a few sips of wine at dinnertime,” Dr. Blamonte notes. “Then you notice bottles of booze missing from the liquor cabinet. Before you know it, your dog is waking up in the gutter somewhere and can’t even remember how to get home.” Dr. Blamonte offers three tips to help recognize if your dog has a drinking problem…

  • 1. Pay attention to your dog’s eating and sleeping habits. If he loses his appetite and seems to be sleeping more, those could be early signs of depression, a drinking problem – or both!
  • 2. Check his coordination. When you toss him a Frisbee he should be able to catch it in his mouth, instead of having it bounce off his head.
  • 3. Check for the smell of liquor on your dog’s breath and fur. Some dogs get so inebriated that they start rolling around in the liquor-soaked ground.

“Look for changes in behaviour, “ says Dr. Blamonte. “Has your pet fallen in with a bad pack of dogs? Has he been spending nights away from home, with there being no explanation for his absence?”. “If your neighbours are constantly calling you to come pick up your dog, chances are he’s getting so drunk he’s wandering into the wrong house, “ says Blamonte. “When you walk your dog, see if he gets tangled up in his leash more than usual. That could be another indication of intoxication.” Dr. Blamonte says it’s important to act as soon as possible if you suspect your dog has a drinking problem. “Fortunately, there are many support groups for hard-drinking dogs these days.” Follow these tips to help your pooch lay off the hooch…

  • 1. Lock up your liquor cabinet at all times.
  • 2. Keep your pet away from other alcoholic pets in the neighbourhood who may be a bad influence.
  • 3. Keep your TV tuned to wholesome religious programming when your dog is in the room.
  • 4. Check your dog’s water dish to make sure he is not sneaking vodka in there.
  • 5. Check for a hidden stash of booze in the doghouse.
  • 6. Keep your pet occupied by playing fetch, Frisbee and other activities that don’t involve imbibing alcohol.

Maybe my dog harry isn’t really playing hungover after all… Ok ok, I am bored out of my mind. I do not have too cook dinner, because my mother is not at the old folks home working – So right now I have free time… Hmmmm. Maybe she’ll let me stir or cut up something. ?:/

Boo the hairy tomato & Candy the porn star

I had to clean the house today. Ever since I started feeling sick my mother has told me not to clean or do the normal things I do. Like making sure my brother doesn’t turn this house into a dump. Washing, cleaning, ironing and all that crap. Anyways, I cleaned out the fridge. I swear that there was a tomato down the bottom that was so old and hairy I could have named it boo and kept it as a pet. I also cooked some cupcakes at my brother request. He likes it when I cook, he waits around until I finally say he can lick the bowl – It’s like he’s 6 year old again. Then my mum came home, asked why the house looked good and sighed. She didn’t want me cleaning, but she was glad the house looks better.

Haysi Fantaysi: im thinking of starting my own business
la angel nikita: what type of business
Haysi Fantaysi: people pay for underwear clad woman to vacuum and stuff
la angel nikita: lmfao
la angel nikita: *dies laughing on the floor*
la angel nikita: i’m still laughing
Haysi Fantaysi: lol
Haysi Fantaysi: hey id be rich
la angel nikita: your joking right?
la angel nikita: lmfao
Haysi Fantaysi: nope
la angel nikita: omg cant breathe… I can just see you in a maids outfit cleaning while some rich guy sits there getting a hard on!
Haysi Fantaysi: yeah
Haysi Fantaysi: lol
la angel nikita: lmfao
la angel nikita: work that vacuum baby yeahhhh
la angel nikita: hahaha sorry… lmfao

She’s a bad, bad vacuum cleaning lady 😉 I’m never gonna let you live that down Candy, for the next few weeks all you’ll hear is vacuum and cleaning jokes. Haha, so classic. Now for more of “candy says the darndest things” brought to you by Kitta…

Haysi Fantaysi: im gonna do porno
la angel nikita: no your not
Haysi Fantaysi: lol what did i just say i forgot
la angel nikita: i’ll break your legs before you do that
Haysi Fantaysi: do what
la angel nikita: candy… were in chat darling. you can see what you just said lol
Haysi Fantaysi: I close my box after each message
la angel nikita: yes ah huh
Haysi Fantaysi: ohhhh is this about me doing pornos
la angel nikita: nooooo could it be!?!
Haysi Fantaysi: lol
la angel nikita: lmao
la angel nikita: aj would kill you
Haysi Fantaysi: did i get it rite do i win a salad?
la angel nikita: I would kill you
la angel nikita: nick would laugh and buy the movie to laugh more
la angel nikita: and Ella would make jokes about it 24/7
la angel nikita: your not doing pornos

Missy rose champion

I was thinking about that game you play to make up porn star names before. Do you know what I’m talking about? You put the name of your first pet and the name of the first street you lived at – Put them together and that’s your porn star name!

Mine is: Missy Rose Champion.

As you can see, mines not too good. I have no idea why I named my dog missy rose in the first place!

I killed my furby

Yeah, I umm… I think I killed my furby. Not by miss-treating it of course, but by fucking with its insides. I was bored, as I normally am a lot, lol. And I saw my furby sitting there; peacefully minding it’s own furby business. When an evil/cruel thought entered my head “I wonder if I could re-program that thing”. I didn’t take the batteries out at first, and it said “woahhhh, oh oh, momma help, oh oh me baby down please” while I tried to take off it’s fur. I finally took the batteries out and shut the bloody thing up. The furby patient was now in deep sleep. So I too off the fur, and noticed it looks pretty fucking wicked without fur. I replaced the batteries and played with a now more aliens looking furby. After that minute of fun was over, I took out the batteries and examined the little shit. I found some chips in there, but they looked modified. Not like anything in a normal computer, so I poked around some more.

I saw the CPU board, and decided not to touch that lol. Then I got bored again (see told you it happens a lot). I decided that it was impossible to re-program it. Because the chips look unable to read, let alone re-write. I put the fur back on and put the batteries in… Nothing happened. I shock it a bit and it still didn’t do anything. When things don’t work, shaking them normally gets things going. Take my CD Walkman for instance; it wouldn’t work after I dropped it. Then three days later, I shock the bloody thing and it started working. Broken laser my ass. And it’s still working now, granted it stops now and then for now reason – But that’s classified as working in my books.

Anyways, back to the dead furby. I took the batteries out and re-placed them again… Nothing. Tried shaking it some more… Nothing. Swore at it… Nothing. Then I remembered that I read in the manual that it can go in to deep sleep. So I found the manual and also a ring I lost ages ago. 🙂 I was wondering where that was! Then I tried the whole waking it up process. Still nothing. I took the fur off again, looked around. It all looked like the same alien like furby, so there shouldn’t be anything wrong. Then I came online and started telling Ella about my lil experiment. Here’s what was said:

Me: i killed my furby 😦
Ella: you killed it?
Me: yeah lol
Me: i took its fur off and then poked around. now it wont work
Me: i’m trying to fix it
Me: why cant i leave things alone 😦
Ella: because you are inquisitive

Then about 10 mins went by where I tried to fix it. Then I finally grabbed it and smashed it really hard on the desk… And what do you know – It work up! I informed Ella of my success:

Me: ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh it’s working lmfao
Ella: cool
Me: i smashed it really hard on the desk and it work up
Me: hahaha
Me: it went “oooooooooo sun got up”
Ella: lol

Anyways, it seems to be working well now. No idea why it stoped working, maybe it was still under from the surgery I performed on it. Or not. I have learned a valuable lesson today. When I’m bored, I should not take things apart, just to see how they work. Screwing with things that are meant to be left alone is not a valid way to pass time. It will always end with something getting smashed. But I really can’t help it, because as Ella said… I am inquisitive.