Kitta Syndrome

Said to a friend…

“They have no real idea of what is wrong with me. They think it may be Crohn’s at the moment. Could you imagine if it was something new and they named it after me… “I’m so sorry, you have Kitta Syndrome, it affects the brains ability to withhold swearing. Without treatment you’ll be swearing like a sailor who has won the lotto and to celebrate has a supermodel sucking off his dick while another one strips to ‘I wanna to sex you up’ by the Backstreet Boys.”

Damn baby, damn.

22 Comments

  1. Kat says:

    Hahahaha.

    I wanna sexxxxx you uuuuup.
    That’s going to be stuck in my head for the rest of the day. 😦

    Like

  2. Dave says:

    FUCK!
    I think that would be soo fucking great! If it gets done, i’m the first fucking one to be diagnosised with it, after you of course, that would be soo cool!

    Like

  3. meg says:

    possibly one of the greatest things i have ever read.
    amazing.

    Like

  4. nick says:

    Your last two blogs have been quite ‘porn’ in nature! I thought you were a nice girl….not that being ‘porn’ isnt nice, just didnt really expect it from you. Keep up the blogging, you always gives me a laugh!

    Like

  5. Mia says:

    Color Me Badd sings that song.

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  6. francey says:

    lovely, but I want to sex you up is by Color Me Badd.

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  7. Jennifer says:

    Don’t they have a name for that already? turrets syndrome?

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  8. Phobia says:

    um.. your scary kitta. very scary!

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  9. Tom says:

    I knew there was a reason I always wanted to be a lottery winning sailor, all but the backstreet boy thing.

    But, on another note, I hope your doctors find something they can treat and you become a picture of health, you already have the picture part down.

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  10. Kitta says:

    Nick: Me, a nice girl? You have read my blog before, right? Re: The cunt entry.

    Mia and Francey: Yes Color Me Badd do sing it, but I was talking about the 95 South remix by the Backstreet Boys.

    Jennifer: Yes, but with tourettes you can’t control it, after extensive reaserch, they have found that people with Kitta syndrome can, but they chose not to.

    Tom: Thank you Tom, I hope they figure it out soon to, I get my MRI results back in a week or two so hopefully they’ll shed some light on the matter.

    Like

  11. Martin says:

    M’am, please step away from the Kool-Aid!

    Seriously, I’m very afraid.

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  12. nick says:

    Well, yeah I have read your blog before but I came late on the scene, Im circa a couple of months ago. You know me… the guy that semi cyber-stalked you in a lame attempt to be funny and quirky! That worked great coz you blocked and ignored me, which is quite understandable! Anyway, I like the cunt story, when I have kids one day I’m sure to tell them that one…I might replace ‘cunt’ with prince or bruce or something like that! In closing…I think you would need some weaponized grade soap to wash your mouth out! Not that you should…it adds to the whole kitta mystique!!!

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  13. Taylor says:

    I’m going to have to agree with Meg. I laughed 🙂

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  14. Darkhorse says:

    Well Kitta, you do hang around a certain Lil’ Red Monkey.

    Monkeys transmit diseases.

    Little Red Monkey Disease, perhaps?

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  15. Mooiness says:

    Woah that was some funny shite! Thanks for the laughter. And any girl that knows that a remix (!) exists for “I wanna sex you up” is DA BOMB. Heh.

    Anyway, dropped by via Technorati’s Blogfinder thing – I searched for “Australian”. 🙂

    Like

  16. Nicole says:

    Has anyone in your family ever been diagnosed with Chron’s or IBD?? Cause it is usually in the family.

    Hope you are 100% soon adn they know exactly what is up with ya hun.

    Ya never know they could make a disease after you 😉

    Take care.

    Like

  17. Baron says:

    What an awesome syndrome. Take that Tourette’s!!

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  18. Clayton says:

    My mother suffers from IBD, and I hope that whatever happens, your problems can be reconciled. My girlfriend has Kitta’s disease, however, she calls it PMS; and she does sort of become smarmy like a sailor during that time , as well.

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  19. kim says:

    Crohn’s thats not a good IBD to have if you got too chose I would would go for Ulcerative Colitis. Like you really get to chose those things. ;-( They have good anti-inflammatory drugs for Crohns though so you should be fairly okay if that was the case. But no friggin Cure!

    I just feel for you cause you have to go through so many tests. My bestwishes to you though no matter what happens.

    Take care mate,

    Kim

    Like

  20. Mark says:

    Maybe you have China Syndrome, where you’re so darn hot you melt a hole in the earth’s crust.

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  21. Dan says:

    Hi Kitta, Have you thought about possible MS ??? My Mother has MS and I have seen some of the symptons before.

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  22. Kitta says:

    Nicole: Yes, there are a few relatives with Crohn’s. That’s one of the reasons they’re looking for it so thoroughly.

    Mark: I hope not, the world would be pissed if I do.

    Dan: No I haven’t because I do not have any symptoms of MS, I have symptoms of IBD.

    Like

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