Dear Harry

I was going to take you for a walk Friday afternoon Harry, it was the second day of spring and the sun was out, also, my back seemed up for a walk. It had been so long since we went for a walk, I could hear the bushes and poles crying out for you to pee on them, your pee was the coolest, the other dogs pee wasn’t the same.

I was just about to come tell you about the fantastic walk we were about to set upon, when I was told that you didn’t look well and I had better come see. I really didn’t expect to see you in the state you were in. You were on the ground, struggling to breathe, and you didn’t respond to anything I said Harry-Boo. You’d start howling now and again and move your legs like you were trying to run, but your eyes were rolled back and you couldn’t move, it’s was horrible. I had to hold your jaw open so you could breathe.

We took you to the local vets and they said you were probably bitten by a snake and we let them give you an injection of anti-venom. It cost $400, but we didn’t care about the cost, we were told it would save you. Then we were told to go home and wait a few hours for it to take effect, those hours were so long. Finally the phone rang and a nurse told us to come pick you up, when I saw you I didn’t know what to think. They said you were stable, but you looked like you were in a coma. They told us to take you home and watch you over the weekend; they were all going home and couldn’t look after you. We asked if you might have had a seizure and they said no, it was not a seizure. They also said you were burnt and your hair was failing out, we saw no signs of burns or your hair falling out before we took you up there.

We decided to take you to another vets even though the local vets said you would make it through the night, we felt that we couldn’t care for you at home and you’d be in better hands at a vets. We didn’t want to be in the situation where you stopping breathing and we couldn’t do anything. We took you to an Emergency Vet Centre which was about an hour away – we told them all the details and waited while they assessed you. After 15 minutes the vets finally came to talk to us. They told us you were in a coma, you had severe brain damage and they wanted to know why we brought a comatose dog in. They told us they had to put you down, they could not send you home with us or put you in the ICU because you wouldn’t recover. This was a far cry from what the local vets told us earlier on.

You apparently had a brain tumour, which caused the massive seizure that you had, I’m told you didn’t feel any pain – I hope that is true. Even if the local vets had of treated you properly it wouldn’t have made a difference, you’d been having the seizure for too long and it cut off oxygen to your brain. It would have been less traumatic for us though. I feel so angry – we listened to them because we thought they knew what they were talking about. I’m not a trained vet, but even I could see you were in a coma.

I wish you could have talked old chap, told me you weren’t well. Looking back, you clearly had a few signs of a brain tumour. You definitely had Geriatric Separation Anxiety and your personality had changed, it was like you were a little puppy again. Remember how we told the local vets about this ages ago and they said you were just being ‘a blue heeler’? We shouldn’t have listened to them. Just four days ago I was outside throwing you your dog beer – it’s hard to believe you’re gone.

Did you know the dog next door sounds exactly like you? It barked a few times today and for a split second I thought “What is Harold barking at?” and then I remembered that you weren’t there.

I miss you Harry, Saturday morning pancakes and TV won’t be the same without you.

Harry

73 Comments

  1. Nicola says:

    oh hun,

    *big hugs for you* Im so sorry for your loss…

    Long live the memory of Harry!!

    xxxxxxxxxxxx

    (ps I hope your gonna have a word with that local vet of yours, even though they wouldnt have been able to do anything more to help.. they got $400 out of you that wasnt needed)

    Like

  2. metao! says:

    Wow. Im really sorry, dude. This is a great tribute.

    Im sure he is chasing children and barking at birds in doggy heaven, where the air is clear and the trees and plentiful and its Smackos all day long.

    RIP.

    Like

  3. Cristina says:

    I am so sorry Kitta! I know how it feels to lose a pet, a member of your family. *hugs*

    Like

  4. stu says:

    awww kitta, thats so sad, so sudden, he had a good life and was well looked after and cared fore, rest in peace harry,

    Like

  5. Swifty says:

    My Condolences.

    Like

  6. Keddy says:

    Hey kitta,
    I know how you feel on thursday my 3 1/2 year old iguanna died too. I miss him lots, also so hey hang in there I know loosing a pet is rough they are part of the family.

    Anyway hope you feel better soon. Sorry for your loss.

    Like

  7. Daniel says:

    I’m so sorry 😦 It’s awfully tough losing someone close to you like that.

    I wish you the best.

    Like

  8. jayjay says:

    Dude I never met harry, but I always thought he was a handsome little guy. I’m sorry for your loss. I’ve lost 3 dogs so I know how you feel. *hugs and kunis*

    Like

  9. Peter says:

    !
    o
    O

    A tear came to my eye. Sincere condolences, Kitta.

    Like

  10. Melissa says:

    I’m so sorry Kitta… 😦 I hope you and your family feel better soon…

    Like

  11. CK says:

    I’ve been through the same thing twice this year, so I know the feeling 😦 My deepest sympathies and condolences.

    Like

  12. Rachael says:

    Aw, doll. It’s so sad to lose a pet, especially when you are close to them. I hope you can feel better soon in knowing that he is better off now. *Hugs*

    Like

  13. Loddy says:

    Oh Kitta I’m so sorry. My condolences.

    Like

  14. Anita says:

    *sigh* I too have a little dog and my boyfriend and I talk about him not being with us sometimes and how we cant imagine it. He is 2 now , still but a puppy but i really cant imagine him not being with us when we go to walks. He goes with us everywhere, hes like an attatchment to our hearts, which is how Id like to put it. The posts you write about Harry always made me smile and made me think how much like my Boofy he is, so attatched to his toys. Boofy too has a toy beer and a pooh bear which he always hassles me with! I really can imagine the pain you are in at the moment, and i can truly sympathise. I got attatched to Harry too. Im ready to cry 😦

    Like

  15. Yang says:

    So sorry to hear that ,cheer up and Harry must be looking forward to your smiling not tears there.

    Like

  16. Darkhorse says:

    Cheers for all the good times you and Harry had together! I’m sure he led a happy fulfilled life with you, Kitta.

    Like

  17. Tiffany says:

    Oh my God I am so sorry hun. I went through something similar with my puppy a couple months ago – he got stepped on and was clearly dying and no one would take him. Finally an emergency vet said even though he was sick he’d come get him, and luckily Bandit is okay.

    I wish your dog could have been as lucky. I really hope you do something about those vets, because they clearly aren’t doing their job. It sounds like they hurt Harry, and maybe caused his death.

    I really hope you are okay. I would be devastated if I were you.

    If you need anyone to talk to drop me a line.

    Lots of hugs and kisses for you.

    Like

  18. John R says:

    I’m so sorry to hear of your loss, Kitta. I read your eulogy for Harry and immediately went and stroked my two dogs, Charlie and Sam, to show them I love them. Rudyard Kipling says it best in his poem “The Power of the Dog”:
    When the body that lived at your single will,
    With its whimper of welcome, is stilled (how still!);
    When the spirit that answered your every mood
    Is gone–wherever it goes–for good,
    You will discover how much you care,
    And will give your heart for the dog to tear.

    Love to you and to the memory of Harry.

    Like

  19. JP (Columbia, South Carolina) says:

    Take what comfort you can from knowing that we all share in your loss.

    Here, all the way around the world, someone whom you’ve never met or spoken with is wishing you strength and happiness.

    There must be some hope in that.

    Smile.

    Like

  20. Rachel says:

    *hugs* I’m sorry that happen Kitta. I’m actually crying here. I can’t believe he is gone. RIP Harry

    Like

  21. Pritam Pal says:

    Unfortunate. But life goes on …

    Like

  22. Becky says:

    I’m sooo sorry about your loss. I can’t imagine how much it must hurt.
    RIP Harry

    Like

  23. I’m sorry about Harry. I understand how it is to have lost a dear friend.

    Like

  24. bob says:

    kitta, I’m a lurker and never comment. I can’t helpt but say sorry to read about Harry. You were the best thing that ever happened to him.

    I’m certain he was glad to have been with all of you.

    Like

  25. Noodlez says:

    My condolences to you Nikita.
    It is always sad to loose a friend.

    Like

  26. Abhay says:

    My condolences.

    Having a dog of my own (a Boxer named Pluto) who was recently involved in a serious accident, I could identify with the anguish and pain of seeing your loved puppy go through all that. Pluto is fine now but for a few minutes, I thought I’d lost him and I knew what he means to me and how much he’s part of my life. I suppose every dog lover knows how that feels. Here is a small poem that might help you through the pain.

    The Rainbow Bridge
    by Steve and Diane Bodofsky

    By the edge of a wood, at the foot of a hill,
    in a lush green meadow where time stands still.
    Where friends of man and woman do run,
    when their time here on earth is over and done.
    For between this world and the next,
    is a place where every beloved creature finds rest.
    On this golden land, they wait and they play,
    until the Rainbow Bridge they cross over one day.
    No more do they suffer in pain or in sadness,
    for here they are whole, their hearts filled with gladness.
    Their limbs are restored, their health renewed,
    their bodies have healed, their strength is imbued.
    They romp through the grass with nary a care,
    until one day they start and sniff at the air.
    All ears prick forward, eyes dart front and back,
    then all of a sudden one breaks from the pack.
    In just that instant, their eyes have met,
    and there reunited – both person and pet.
    So they run to each other, these friends from long past,
    there time of parting over at last.
    The sadness they felt while they were apart,
    has turned to joy once more in each heart.
    They embrace with a love that will last forever,
    then side by side they cross over together.

    [a]

    Like

  27. ggb says:

    cheer up…you know…like the movie…all doggies go to heaven…and stuff. =]

    Be happy and don’t dwell on it…Harry would have wanted it that way. ^.^

    Like

  28. Bob says:

    I’m so sorry for lost such a good friend. There is nothing like the adoration and love of a dog. Their lives are shorter than ours by nature and I think it is in part so that we learn to appreciate those that are special in our life. He will live on for you in your remembrance and in your heart. It is so sad isn’t it, but I urge you to reflect on the wonderful life he had. Sleep now Harry, rest.

    Like

  29. Ana says:

    Aww… My sincere condolences go out to you hun’. Petowners like ourselves, never EVER imagine our babies will be gone. That one day, they will eventually have to go, we outlive them. But when it actually happens, it’s too much to bear. I have 2 dogs and a cat. I cant’ imagine the day I have to let them go… *sigh*
    Many Blessings to you and I know Harry is in heaven looking upon you.
    ***Hugs***
    Ana

    Like

  30. Kayhadrin says:

    Sincere condolences. May your spirits meet again.

    Like

  31. Lis says:

    So sorry to hear about little Harry.. I hope you will be comforted to know that so many people care about you and hope your spirits will be lifted one day soon…

    Like

  32. Nick B says:

    Im so truly sorry Kitz. It’s always hard loosing a dearly loved pet. Thanks for letting us get to know Harry through your blog and photos.

    Like

  33. Kris says:

    I’m sorry to hear that. I know how much he meant to you from all your posts. It is always hard to loose a family member. I dread the day when I will recieve the same news of my 11+ year old dog who has trouble breathing. When you’re done grieving, consider action against the vet so that the next time a sick animal goes in there, they treat it with care and respect.

    Like

  34. Candy says:

    :o( *hugs* Awww Kitta you got me crying again that was beautiful.

    Like

  35. I am so sorry to hear about this. I wish there some thing, I could say to help you though this and take the pain away.
    No matter what he will be with you. Time will ez the pain.
    you had me teary-eyed 😦 Pets be come family, and it hurts to lose a love one. bigs hugs for you.

    Dan M. Salem, MA USA

    Like

  36. Roy says:

    Condolences and hugs from Mexico =`( ….

    Like

  37. Seraphena says:

    Oh Kitta…..that’s so sad. Reading that post made tears well up in my eyes. You’ve talked of Harry so much in your past posts and it is indeed, hard to believe he is gone. None the less, we can be sure he’s content and no doubt having a ball of a time, while always holding fond memories of the wonderful life and happiness your brought him.

    Like

  38. Sammie says:

    Aww Kitta. This brings tears to my eyes.

    I want to say something to make you feel better, but I know theres nothing that can do that. I know how hard it is to loose your baby. Someone thats been in the family for so long. My cat died from cancer. I will never forget the day I woke up to feel him not breathing and my whole body just sunk.

    I hope you can keep all the good memories for as long as you live.

    God bless luv.

    Like

  39. Greg says:

    That’s a heartbreaking story Kitta. Harry seemed like a wonderful little dog. I’ve usually taken the loss of a pet harder than losing a relative. Somehow saying goodbye to the little friend you’ve loved and protected from the world is almost too much to bear. If heaven awaits when this life is over, I know Harry-Boo will be waiting for you.

    Like

  40. Zinke says:

    Sorry for your loss of Harry. I bet he was a great pal and you’ll always have fond memories of walks and playing together! Best Wishes!

    Like

  41. Shane says:

    My condolences, Kitta. I had a collie pass away years ago from illness, and I still miss him. He was a happy dog with a happy life, though, as he let us know every day. I think Harry would want you to know the same about him.

    Like

  42. shaan says:

    thats sad news kitta, dont know what i would do without my blitzen …

    Like

  43. drea says:

    aww, sorry for the loss 😦

    Like

  44. Ian says:

    Sorry for your loss …………Know How you feel still think of my best mate …..on and of after 5 years .
    Hope all is well ………..have good memorys ….thay always
    stay with you .
    Ian
    PS. Love your site.

    Like

  45. erin says:

    So, so sorry. I hope you’re okay.

    Like

  46. Hi Kitta,
    I just me again. I hope you are recovering form the lose of harry. You do have a way woth words to move us all so deepy to tear up. You should be a writer with the gift that you have. Anyway, Hope you are feeling better and as I said before, time will heal the pain.

    your friend
    Dan M. MA, USA

    Like

  47. kenny says:

    Sorry for your loss 😦

    Like

  48. Char says:

    My condolences.. x

    Like

  49. victor says:

    thats too bad, sorry, harry boo was a nice doggy

    Like

  50. ensie says:

    This is my first visit to your blog, and I’m typing this in tears. You’ve written a wonderful tribute to a great dog. So sorry for your loss.

    Like

  51. My condolences to you. Just think about the good times you had with Harry.

    Like

  52. Jamey says:

    So sorry to hear that your dog died.
    My brother died in a motorcycle accident last year. (2003)
    I’ve prayed to my brother to look after Harry in the afterlife.
    He loved dogs while he was alive so Harry will definitely be a great companion for him.
    Dogs don’t go to Doggy Heaven…
    They go to the REAL Heaven and hang out with our deceased friends and relatives!
    Check out my brother’s website at:
    http://www.corychapman.com
    Please take a moment to sign his Guestbook and/or Guestmap.
    (P.S.) Kitta, I’m the guy who informed you of some other girl using your pic on HotorNot.com)

    Like

  53. SoBo jb says:

    Nice eulogy. R.I.P. Harry.

    Like

  54. olkgal says:

    i can relate to your loss. my dog passed away in her sleep while i was at work. i never got to say goodbye. till today, i miss her so much. at time, i still dream of her. it’s so real that when i wake up, i still think that she’s asleep on the bed with me.

    dogs love you unconditionally, so how can you not do the same back? hence the loss is so great.

    Just remember that harry was loved by you and he loves you back in his silly doggy way 🙂

    Like

  55. ZOP says:

    I’m so sorry for your loss Nikita….my family, we’ve been life-long dog owners and over the years we’ve lost I believe five. Every singl time it’s devastating. They’re your best friends, a memebr of the family, a little four legged brother or sister.

    I don’t know what else to say, but words dont’ help much at times like these anyway. Just know Harry would certainly want you to go on.

    *hug*

    ~Z

    Like

  56. MaThIbUs says:

    That’s so sad! My condolences.

    To hell with those local vets. “A blue heeler”, poor dog! If they wouldn’t have been so shitty back then, Harry might’ve still been alive.

    A couple of years ago, I experienced that our local vet was lying to us, too. Our oldest dog, Boomer, had to go on a routine investigation. The vet claimed he had heart problems, and subscribed expensive (not that we ever care about price, as long it helps Boomer) pills, which we had to buy in her practice. (Later we found out the local drugstore was selling the very same pills at a much much lower price.) As we never noticed anything wrong with Boomer before, we found all this very strange. He seemed like a healthy dog.
    As we started giving Boomer the pills, nothing changed.
    Eventually, we went to another vet in a city nearby for a second opinion. He investigated Boomer, and came to the conclusion that nothing was wrong. The pills, in fact, would harm him if we continued on giving them to him unnecessaryly.
    I needn’t say we never ever visited the first vet again.

    Two weeks ago—but that’s a whole different story—, Boomer had serious breathing problems, too. We all were so afraid to lose him… I’m saying this, because that’s why I can imagine what you are and have been going through. I’m really sorry for your loss.

    (Luckily, things ended out well for Boomer—he’s sitting right next to me as I’m writing this comment.)

    Like

  57. ggb says:

    love the shirt, dorothy!

    like the chix0r and the I eat boys shirt lol

    Like

  58. Marie says:

    We put my dog, Precious, of 13 years to sleep on 4-24-04. It was the worst day of my life. I still cry often. It sounds weird to some people when I say this, but she was my life. I could never even love a human the way I loved her. We had to put her to sleep because she was getting so old she could barely walk. Good luck hun. Visit petloss.com if it helps. That site just makes me cry.

    Like

  59. jayjay says:

    I haven’t seen joyful but you remember how she was she lost jilly. check out some cool dance moves and put lil smile on. http://dickcream.com/history/0611/

    Like

  60. apex says:

    sorry to hear about the lose of ur beloved harry, he’s up in doggy heaving looking down on you

    Like

  61. Steve says:

    I recently discovered your site by mistake but was pleasently surprised. Very sad news about Harry, keep ya chin up.

    Time heals all wounds.

    Like

  62. Paul says:

    holy crap! that would be that worst thing! a pet dying when you thought they were fine. Feel sorry for you. Don’t worry, he’ll always be in your memory and i think that’s the most important part of him you can have (well except from him being alive of course). hope you feel better soon.

    Like

  63. Vela says:

    That entry made me so sad
    Harry, even I miss you <3

    Like

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  65. kelly says:

    My heart breaks for you, Kitta.

    Like

  66. Lilly says:

    That is so sad, I was in tears as I read your entry. I can only imagine what it can be like to lose someone/something you love. A pet is like a family member, similar to a brother, a sister sometimes even a child. To lose them is to lose a family member, and I can understand your pain. I pray that he is in heaven (where he belongs) looking down at you and smiling. He knows you loved him, and that’s what matters. You made his stay on earth a pleasant one, it was his time… and one day you shall share heaven with him. Take care kitta and I am trully sorry. 😦

    Like

  67. girlwonder says:

    wow. there are very few PEOPLE that i feel this strongly about and to see you feel that way about your beloved harry makes my heart break. sorry for your loss.

    Like

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