Speeding Bloody Roo

I receive a lot of email from people enquiring about kangaroos. Do we ride them? Do we keep them as pets? Do they save people just like Skippy did? The answers to these kinds of questions is mostly ‘no’, due to the fact that if you get near a wild kangaroo you will probably get your ass kicked. I don’t want my ass kicked, so I’ve only ever been close to joeys or small kangaroos kept in captivity. Sometimes when I go walking in the bush I’ll see a family of wild kangaroos, but I never go to close or make my presence know because of the whole ass kicking thing.

Don't make me come over there...

Last week my mother got quite close to a roo, a bit to close for her own liking.

She was driving to work early in the morning, the sun was just starting to warm things up and take the chill out of the cold morning air. The road she takes has bushlands all around it and from time to time kangaroos will cross the road (to get to the other side of course). She tends to drives slowly down this road, the kangaroos come hopping out of the bush at high speeds and she wouldn’t want to hit one of them. This ‘slow down for the roo’s and all will be sweet’ theory worked pretty well, for a while. She was on the look out for any roo’s when suddenly she heard a large bang, she looked to her left where the sound originated from and saw a large kangaroo had hopped into the side of her car. After a few seconds of shock it got up and hopped away, while most likely thinking…

“Struth. I hit one of those shiny moving things again. Oh well, she’ll be apples.”

The roo seemed unfazed, like it smashed into cars all the time for fun. The car, on the other hand, is now badly dented. All thanks to a speeding bloody roo who clearly hasn’t seen the ‘slow down, save lives’ ads on TV.

Now she’s left wondering, does the insurance cover kangaroos hopping into the side of her car?

27 Comments

  1. jayjay says:

    wow you go walking in the bush? how about wombats and dingos? austrailia sounds so exciting. I hear there are diamond mines in perth is that true? glad you mum is all apples but sorry to her about her ride.

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  2. Tamara says:

    The same kinda thing happens here, ‘cept with deer and moose. My father-in-law had one of those “objects in mirror closer than may appear” scares a while back. Checking his passenger side mirror, he saw a deer nose. Yep. The nose. Then he heard the bang. The deer had run into the side of his car, got up, and walked back into the woods.

    huh.

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  3. Kitta says:

    That’s right JJ, there are diamond mines in WA, they’re in the Kimberley, The Argyle Mines. I love the pink diamonds they produce. 🙂

    http://www.argylediamonds.com.au

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  4. Noodlez says:

    I used to get asked all the time if there were kangaroos in my street to which I would answer no, untill I saw one jumping down the middle of the road towards the beach.
    I swear kangaroos just like to prove us wrong.

    Like

  5. Bob says:

    I am sad now… I always pictured my aussie friends riding kangroos around. I am glad that you mom didn’t get her ass kicked. I had a herd of buffalo lean against my car once.. just make note that this is something you would prefer not happen.

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  6. stu says:

    ok so now we have had a lesson on the kangaroo’s may be you might like to educate us all on the snakes and spiders in aussey land, ive seen crock a dial dundee several times

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  7. Andy says:

    What about koalas and pandas, do they behave the same? Or are they just too stoned because of the eukalyptus they eat?
    In Switzerland, where I live, cows don’t act so stupid – even with cow insanity…

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  8. Daniel says:

    The only kangaroos I’ve ever seen were on Kangaroo Jack. And I think they were computer-animated, because I don’t think Kangaroos talk and dance and all that. But that was a cool Kangaroo, on Kangaroo Jack, he was teh shit. And that aussie chick was hot, too. Best. Movie. Ever.

    Like

  9. Reaz says:

    So I guess it is true. Animals around the world will occasionally do really stupid things. I guess things really aren’t that different where ever you go.

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  10. alex says:

    can you post a picture of the dent?

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  11. She’ll be apples. i wonder what the etymology of that saying is…..

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  12. John R says:

    Re the insurance. When a roo bounced in front of my car when I was in Mount Gambia, the insurance company (RAC) paid up without any dramas. The little bugger bounced alongside quite happily and then did a sharp right straight in front of the car. Good job we were going VERY slowly otherwise it’d have been sitting in my wife’s lap! Good luck to your mum.

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  13. ggb says:

    do you have a different camera, kitta? FOr some reason it is looking better to me…What is it called again?

    Here in hawaii…or town side…I don’t see much wild animals… *sigh* But I hear we do have sharks lol

    Oh and there is supposedly some roos in hawaii too…like a pack in kalihi valley…

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  14. Kitta,
    I know the deer that decided to use my hood as a spring board to clear the top of my car pissed my insurance guy off. The damage was however paid for. This is the US however and everyone including the insurance guys know we are law suit happy.
    love and light,
    Robyn

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  15. Nicola says:

    I know what you mean about those kangaroos, last summer my hubby and I were driving back from a visit to my parents house and the car in front of ours hit a roo, they managed to keep on driving.. we drove over it as there was absolutely no time to stop safely… the car in front that hit it, basically made it bounce up into the road.. that sounds awful… anyway we hit it and you should have seen the damage to the front of our car, it ripped the bumper clean off, smashed the front end in and ruined something in the engine, all i can remember was the bump, and the smoke .. and the car was basically wrecked….

    the insurance covered it, through RAA I think,.. I dont remember my hubby ever saying it didnt… ho hum…. they are bloody dangerous they are when they get in the road!!! so be careful everyone lmao…

    and wild kangaroos, ive been near a few myself and when they get fidgity you dont wanna be near them, or if they are brave enough to come up to you coz you have food, well lets say they like having a feel in your pockets… makes you miggggggggghty uncomfortable lol!!!!

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  16. Luc says:

    here in quebec canada we have an animal that is called the stinking beast,there defense is a liquide that smells terrible and just sticks in the air,it is about as big as a cat,if you run over one whith your car (which as happen to me….) you could imagine the rest…but just imagine whene your dog who is not afraid of a cat of course goes after one(which has happen to me to…..)

    Luc

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  17. jayjay says:

    An essay on the little red monkey
    To delve deeply into the little red monkey is an exciting adventure. I really, really like the little red monkey. Indispensable to homosapians today, several of todays most brilliant minds seem incapable of recognising its increasing relevance to understanding future generations. Crossing many cultural barriers it still draws remarks such as ‘I wouldn’t touch it with a barge pole’ and ‘i’d rather eat wasps’ from the over 50, many of whom blame the influence of television. Relax, sit back and gasp as I display the rich tapestries of the little red monkey.

    Social Factors

    Society begins and ends with the little red monkey. The immortal and indispensable phrase ‘honesty is the best policy’ [1] globalised an issue which had remained buried in the hearts of our ancestors for centuries. A society without the little red monkey is like a society without knowledge, in that it provides standards by which we may judge our selves.

    Special care must be taken when analysing such a delicate subject. On the other hand anyone that disagrees with me is an idiot. It grows stonger every day.

    Economic Factors

    The dictionary defines economics as ‘the social science concerned with the production, distribution, exchange, and consumption of goods and services’. We will begin by looking at the Fish-Out-Of-Water model. For those of you unfamiliar with this model it is derived from the Three-Amigos model but with greater emphasis on the outlying gross national product. Housing
    Prices

    the little red monkey

    When displayed this way it becomes very clear that the little red monkey is of great importance. Clearly housing prices sings a very different tune. Perhaps to coin a phrase the little red monkeyeconomics will be the buzz word of the century

    Political Factors

    Politics – smolitics! Looking at the spectrum represented by a single political party can be reminiscent of comparing the little red monkey and political feeling.

    It is always enlightening to consider the words of that most brilliant mind Vatusia Skank ‘The success of any political system can only truly be assessed once the fat lady has sung.’ [2] What a fantastic quote. To paraphrase, the quote is saying ‘the little red monkey wins votes.’ Simple as that.

    Is the little red monkey politically correct, in every sense? Each man, woman and to a lesser extent, child, must make up their own mind.
    Conclusion

    In my opinion the little red monkey has, and will continue to be a major building block for the world in which we live. It inspires, provides financial security and always chips in.

    I will leave you with the words of Hollywood’s Leonardo Lennon: ‘I demand the little red monkey, nothing more nothing less.’ [3]

    ——————————————————————————–

    [1] Traditional – possibly first said by King Arthor… but probably not.

    [2] Skank – Politics for Dummies – PV6 Media

    [3] Go mad for the little red monkey – Issue 132 – Kendeal Books

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  18. Kris says:

    Luc, Is “stinking beast” a skunk?? Because I hate skunks…. They’ve sprayed my dog wayyyy to many times. And deer, wow, they are North America’s Kangaroo I guess… My uncle was side swiped by deer I think 3 or 4 times in his life. They are everywhere!!! They are probably just getting revenge for hunting season though…. for that I don’t blame them. (They might have bad aim though, since my uncle does not hunt…. or myself for that matter, but I’ve successfully dodged all thrown at me so far).

    Like

  19. dan says:

    Not sure about the apples comment.. How do apples and injury coincide w/ each other?

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  20. Reaz says:

    LOL @ The Little Red Monkey Essay. Also I have to say that luckily no animal has assulted my vehicle with their body while I was riding around.

    Like

  21. Malach says:

    I approve of the term Apples. I approve wholeheartedly.

    Like

  22. Nathan Logan says:

    “That. Was. AWESOME!

    Oh, sorry about your car, man – that sucks.”

    Like

  23. Paul says:

    That proves it. You are definitely a “Fair Dinkum Aussie Sheila” to have come up with that line for the kangaroo. (Please don’t take offence to the “Sheila” bit, I’m just tryin’ to be true blue back at ya mate, can I call you Bruce to save confusion?).

    I was driving west of Adelaide near Ceduna once when I hit a roo. Just imagine, hours of nearly dead straight boring road, 1am in the morning, tryin’ to fight off white line fever when BAM! (the sixties batman type bam) a roo slams into the car and takes out the front left headlight.

    Lucky it didn’t take out the front windscreen really.

    Your truly,
    Bruce.

    Like

  24. Kris says:

    No post about the Olympic closing ceremony? There was lots of material there you could’ve used too!!! I was all excited while watching it, thinking, “Wow, Kitta’s gonna make a good blog entry about this! I can’t wait!”….. But there still is none…. NoNe! 😦

    Like

  25. jayjay says:

    cheer up kris! and watch your tone. play nice 🙂

    Like

  26. Jennifer says:

    Haha. How totally adorable and cute. Not for your mother, of course, and her now dented car. Don’t most insurance companies have an act-of-God category? You know, for forest fires, floods, storms, etc.? Wouldn’t animals fall under that?

    Like

  27. Kitta says:

    Andy, the koalas are quite stoned because of the eucalyptus leaves they eat. I’m glad you didn’t say “from all the beer you aussie’s feed them”, that joke gets tiring.

    Alex, the dent has been fixed, so I can’t take a picture, unless I re-dented it for re-enactment purposes. I’m sure my mother would frown upon that.

    GGB, Yes I do have a new camera, a Ricoh Caplio G4 wide.

    Kris, I had the closing ceremony on in the background while I was working, so I wasn’t paying attention. I also missed the MTV awards too. I haven’t been watching very much TV.

    Jennifer, speaking of acts of god, has anyone ever watched “The Mad Who Sued God”? Funny aussie movie.

    She’ll be apples means “everything will be good” or “oh well”. As it turns out, the insurance company does pay up for Roo damage.

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