Kitta.net - Don’t feed or spank the monkey

A true friend is some one who is prepared to stab you in the front with a bendy straw.

Leet WoW Hacker

Posted on Tuesday, 29th May 2007 at 10:48pm
23 Comments Ensuing

I was doing some grocery shopping today, and as I stood in the pasta aisle perusing mediterranean vegetable sauces I overheard this conversation between two middle aged ladies…

“I found this strange payment on my credit card statement today… My son was the last to use it to pay his phone bill, I questioned him about it and he said it was for some WoW thing. He said it was a game, but I’m not completely sure, I think he might be one of them hacker kids.”

“Noooo!”

“He always uses these strange sayings, like ‘owned’ around his sister, he said ‘FTW’ yesterday when I brought home pizza for dinner. I don’t know what they mean. I think it’s hacker speak.”

“I saw a documentary on them, they could make free phone calls and everything! They called the Pope, Oprah and the White House!”

“Really? Maybe he’s doing that; calling all his friends for free and, shit, I hope Telstra doesn’t find out and sue us!”

I couldn’t help but laugh at this point, the sheer stupidly of the conversation brought out a chuckle in me, as I laughed the two ladies turned and looked at me. I had to think of something to say to avoid being rude…

“You know, if he starts saying he’s doing raids, watch out…”

I paused, looked around, and then leaned in closer…

“It’s a secret WoW code word for hacking into government computers.”

I nodded knowingly and walked away. I meant to be sarcastic, but it seemed to come off as honestly and insight. Oops. I would like to take this opportunity to say sorry to the poor young lad whose WoW fun I have ultimately killed. So sorry. So very very sorry.

I totally owned you.

23 Responses to “Leet WoW Hacker”

Jim Whimpey comments:

May 29th, 2007 at 10:58pm

You so did not say that!

zerzhul comments:

May 29th, 2007 at 10:59pm

wow, just… wow, you totally pwned that kid… in other news, I find it frightening how much ignorance does to increase hysteria.

shep comments:

May 30th, 2007 at 12:28am

wow. this was great. i couldn’t help but laugh out loud on this one.

Kitta comments:

May 30th, 2007 at 12:30am

Jim, I did indeed. I was having a bad day; suffering from PMS, being told off by a receptionist for being two minutes late to my appointment, no lactose free chocolate in stock, having family members try to hit me up for money. I get overly sarcastic when I’m annoyed.

Keg comments:

May 30th, 2007 at 1:11am

Kitta, you make the world awesome

Mike comments:

May 30th, 2007 at 3:00am

Oh. My. God.

I wish I had the opportunity to do something like that! That comment is just loaded full of seven kinds of awesome!

Keep it up. hehe.

Kitty comments:

May 30th, 2007 at 4:00am

Kitta FTW!!!!!!

Anna comments:

May 30th, 2007 at 8:00am

hahaha! That’s fantastic. You probably saved the kid years and years of his life.

Gary comments:

May 30th, 2007 at 11:17am

That is just so funny. Hope it wasn’t your local shop. You’ll get know as that inside “hacker”. Anyway you just saved someone from years of WoW slavery.

WOW comments:

May 31st, 2007 at 8:10am

My my aren’t we still full of our selfs. we think we sooooo smart, now it all!!! Must be so cool to be you and know it all

little Bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ernie comments:

May 31st, 2007 at 10:16am

This is, quite possibly, the best eavesdropped conversation ever. That is all.

Kitta comments:

May 31st, 2007 at 4:02pm

74.75.89.218 (WOW), at least I understand the difference between ‘now’ and ‘know’ and don’t spend my days molesting exclamation marks. Your grammar is a travesty.

Jen comments:

June 1st, 2007 at 1:18am

Mr WOW, whatever your name is.. You spell like a 6yo and act like a spoilt brat who is angry with his mommy for taking away his WOW too! Boohoo… Kitta rocks and you’re just jealous. Little bitch is a name for you.

Blog was sooo funny Kitta! Keep it up!

Chanel comments:

June 1st, 2007 at 4:11am

Guffaw, Parents!

That conversation you overheard reminds me of something Microsoft (I think?) brought out a couple years ago.. It was this feature on internet gaming, 1337 Speak, and how to make sure you’re not bullied on internet games and such.

It never ceases to amuse me when someone writes a paper on stuff like ‘gamer talk’ and tries to intellectualize it (like this).. and just picturing people like those two ladies reading something like that.. rofl.

Mark comments:

June 1st, 2007 at 4:46pm

Pwned via granny – very humiliating. Well played

caramaena comments:

June 7th, 2007 at 5:40pm

roflz – t0tally pwn3d that kid – ftw Kitta!!!!111

Gerald Buckley comments:

June 15th, 2007 at 7:49pm

Might have suggested she listen closely for a word sounding suspiciously like “Prawn” (aka pr0n)… Code for I’ve hacked the Russian silo codes.

I think I’ll apply as a grocery sacker in Perth. Too fun!

Ryan comments:

June 19th, 2007 at 11:16am

Ran across this site unexpectedly, but what a read for this one!!

PwnAGE!!

Great work in the write up, had me laughing the entire time.

carlo comments:

June 23rd, 2007 at 4:42am

HAHA! thats hilarious!

and so wrong of you!
grr.

but funny. good job.

Jason comments:

June 28th, 2007 at 11:32pm

I totally LOL’ed at this post….

nice work fooling the masses

Matt comments:

June 29th, 2007 at 12:09pm

I love it when things like this happen.

Caius Durling comments:

August 2nd, 2007 at 2:56am

Hahahahahaha, I actually LOL’d in the staff canteen and now everyone is looking at me like I’m a freak! Thanks for that laugh kitta.

Wen comments:

August 12th, 2007 at 4:05pm

Pwned, owned, wiped etc etc… you totally DPS’d that boy’s WoW playing time with no healer in sight!

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Kitta

Nikita (Kitta) Kashner is a 20-something year old girl who lives in Perth, Western Australia. Trained blogger, photographer, jewellery designer, writer, gamer, sexy geek and monkey tamer, who spends her spare time trying to stop the Little Red Monkey from taking over the world. So far, she's stopped him 43 times... Continue?