Things Matt Can’t Have
Matt and I have been together for six months today – I will now pause for you all to let out a "dawwww" - and since I have known him not a week has pasted without him asking if he can have random silly things, as most are animal based I always reply with a stern "no". It's not that I'm being mean, sure, if he had a farm with a salt lake he could have a Dolphin and a Zebra, but since he rents a townhouse I doubt his landlord or his housemates would be very happy about a Dolphin being in the bath or a Zebra in the kitchen. I now present you with a list I have kept of things he can't have...
Things Matt can't have
- Helper monkey
- Baby panda
- Pod racer
- Pet Jar Jar Binks
- Penguin
- Beaver
- Baby polar bear
- Baby lion
- Lion
- Dolphin
- Baby seal
- Cheetah
- Zebra
- Eagle
- Hawk
- Raven
- Pet midget
- Squirrel
- Chipmunk
- Turtle
- Fox
- Lemur
- Mongoose
- Tortoise
- Quokka
- Giraffe
- Musk ox
- A flux capacitor
- $3000 LCD TV (apparently one needs a $3000 TV for an Xbox 360's graphics to look any good)
- Matching scooters and scooter jackets
- A robot ATM (like the one on the ANZ bank TVC)
"Why don't you ever want something normal, like a puppy or a hooker" I asked him one day, to which he replied "would you let me have a puppy or a hooker?"
Note to self: Never take Matt to the zoo.
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Nikita is a 20-something year old geeky girl that resides in Perth, Western Australia. She is currently studying and working in the health industry. She spends her spare time blogging sporadically, taking photos, gaming, volunteering, geocaching, making jewellery and trying to stop the Little Red Monkey from taking over the world. So far, she's stopped him 36 times.
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There are currently 12 of the Little Red Monkeys minions present and 4,320,589 have done his evil biddings since July 18th 2002. Over 772,425 menacing spam comments have been caught and swiftly decapitated to punish them for their villainous ways. His ranting appeared on your screen at a rate of 2.249 seconds.
June 30th, 2006 - 22:34
I’ll be really worried about him!! He a little to much into animals!!! You better not take him to the zoo, he might get to excited lol lol he be humping the animals lol lol
that great 6 months a a great start. I am sure the two of you are happy .
Dan
Maine, USA
June 30th, 2006 - 22:35
We are so going to the zoo sweetie
July 1st, 2006 - 00:17
My exgirlfriend told me I couldn’t have a mirror cat
July 1st, 2006 - 01:58
Don’t most boys love the crazy outrageous things? Pet midget – only if it was Thai and did massages. Now that’d be COOL.
July 1st, 2006 - 03:17
If your Thai masseur was a midget he wouldn’t be able to reach up to the massage table. It just doesnt make sense, dammit!
July 1st, 2006 - 05:01
I was just joking about that kitta and matt. Hay matt, how about some bigger things like a 64 foot boat
hmmmm yess!
July 1st, 2006 - 10:06
Come on a 40″ LCD TV is only $2500AUD
and its well worth the money 
July 1st, 2006 - 16:10
This is the list of things Matt can’t have Dan, I’m allowed a boat… I just need to win lotto :p
July 1st, 2006 - 22:25
Pet midget, ey? My boyfriend wants one too!
July 2nd, 2006 - 00:07
Things Matt Can Have:
1. Kitta
Need there be a number 2?
July 2nd, 2006 - 00:49
Matteh: wow she let you have that thats good. she look good up ther on the bow with her bikini lol lol.
Dan
Maine USA
July 2nd, 2006 - 07:44
Dan, not only do you type like an 8 year old from a foriegn country, but you’re also trying way too hard to impress Kitta/Matt. In hopes of becomming an “inner-circle” friend?
Keep it real. You apologised for seemingly no reason, simply because neither Kitta nor Matt replied to your first comment and you, being paranoid, insecure and self-concious, made yourself believe that you’d upset them somehow.
Good Day~
- Your Resident Psychologist
July 2nd, 2006 - 07:49
Heehee, you so have to let him get a helper monkey. *pictures Matt playing his XBox360 on his $3000 T.V while a monkey picks at his hair and combs crumbs out of his four-day-old beard*.
July 3rd, 2006 - 00:36
a pole mounted flat screen are a professional item and quite kool especially if you like to move round in object orientations..
but he might not want..
http://flickr.com/photos/sarchi/179852146/in/photostream/
July 4th, 2006 - 15:38
What about a puppy that was a hooker (aka hooker puppy)?
July 4th, 2006 - 22:33
The $3000 TV will not just make the 360 graphics look any good, but SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO good, you will think you are there….so really, you’d be paying $3000 for a lifetime of awesome expiriences. Sounds like a deal to me.
July 4th, 2006 - 23:57
I’ve missed making comments on here..been rather busy….i still love you though!
May 27th, 2007 - 12:43
Great work and pretty colors!