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Top Bloke

Posted on Wednesday, 11th January 2006 at 9:55pm

Do you know Dan?

I got to know Dan quite well this week while waiting for an appointment, I sat in a waiting room for about 20 minutes listening to the guy behind me have a conversation with a younger girl about The Great Dan, who is a top bloke by the way, even if he does break shit a lot when he’s not smoking.

Guy: All my friends are top blokes.
Girl: Yeah.
Guy: Josh, now Josh is a top bloke.
Girl: He’s bit of a pot head.
Guy: But he’s still a top bloke.
Girl: Yeah.
Guy: Dan’s a top bloke too.
Girl: I don’t know, he seems a bit… on edge at times, like he’s going to kill me with an axe at any moment.
Guy: Yeah, he’s quit smoking again, every time he quits smoking he breaks everyone’s stereos.
Girl: Oh.
Guy: He just goes nuts without the fags.
Guy: He’s a top bloke though.
Girl: Yeah.
Guy: You know how his windshield is cracked?
Girl: Yeah.
Guy: He cracked that the last time he quit smoking while he was trying to kill a fly by punching it.
Girl: …
Guy: We told him to just keep smoking, it’s not worth quiting.
Girl: …
Guy: Top bloke that Dan though.

It was at that point in the conversation that I my name was called, which is a pity, I was really enjoying hearing about the adventures of nicotine addicted Dan. He’s a top bloke you know. They could make a drinking game out of that guy, every time he says ‘top bloke’ you drink a shot, you would be plastered in no time.

13 Responses to “Top Bloke”

Mark Says:
January 11th, 2006 at 10:33pm
Even potheads, axe-murderers and nicotine freaks need friends. Still, I wonder what stuff people say about me before they add that I’m a top bloke…
David Cohen Says:
January 12th, 2006 at 2:52pm
I love how, after this post, there are Google ads on the page for techniques to stop smoking. The Quit campaign must regard Kitta as a top bloke.
Can you tell the uninformed among us how this happens, or is it black online voodoo?
David “top bloke” Cohen
Stef Says:
January 12th, 2006 at 9:17pm
LOL… It sounds like “he’s a top bloke though” is the new “not that there’s anything wrong with that”.
ted Says:
January 12th, 2006 at 10:05pm
tagged!
Karma Says:
January 13th, 2006 at 9:22am
My ex-flatmate once cracked his windscreen by punching a fly.
I thought he was the only person stupid enough to do it.. he’s a top bloke though.
Dan Maine USA Says:
January 13th, 2006 at 10:56am
wow ” He goes nots with out a fag” Wow i guess fag must have a different meaning there then here in the states.

Dan
Natalie Says:
January 14th, 2006 at 3:24pm
This is a really cute site.
nickadonian Says:
January 15th, 2006 at 12:47am
I know a guy called dan….hes a top wanker…but he has never smoked a ciggie in his life…that could be the reason!
kris Says:
January 16th, 2006 at 4:25am
Its sad what passes for Top Blokes these days…

btw, is this what your sparkler bomb on New Years looked like? http://www.muchosucko.com/video-newyearsbomb.html
Brian Says:
January 16th, 2006 at 10:38am
Found you linked on the 2005 Bloggies and I just love your layout!
Rachel Says:
January 16th, 2006 at 1:10pm
That’s great. I love overhearing strange bits of other people’s conversation.
Paul Says:
January 16th, 2006 at 10:25pm
Pity we can’t harness the energy of all the top blokes!!?
mintox Says:
January 18th, 2006 at 12:19pm
I really take offence to the misuse of the term Top Bloke. You can be sure that if you use the words “but” or “though in conjunction with “top bloke” that the person you’re referring to as a top bloke, isn’t really a top bloke eg. “he likes to beat up old ladies but he’s a top bloke”.

I suppose there is no strict definition of a top bloke but you can include someone who always buys you a beer without you asking, a mate who helps you fix your car without asking for anything in return etc… not really someone who smashes car windows cos he needs a ciggie.

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