Ain’t Good Enough
Posted on Saturday, 30th July 2005 at 1:25am11 Comments Ensuing
I turn into the next aisle at the supermarket and see two men and a young boy, one of the men is eating some bird seed, he puts the bird seed down and proclaims…
“If it ain’t good enough to feed a human, then don’t feed it to a bird is what I say.”
Ain’t that profound?
Deli Lady
Posted on Wednesday, 27th July 2005 at 3:08am19 Comments Ensuing
The lady at my local deli doesn’t seem to like me.
Now I know that this shouldn’t bother me, but damnit, I want to have a friendly relationship with my deli lady. I wish for it to mimic the relationship I had with my previous deli lady – she was epitome of all deli ladies worldwide – ex-deli lady would make jokes about how anybody could beat her prices, but since everywhere else was closed I was screwed, so I better bloody enjoy the insanely over priced can of tuna.
The new owner is not the same, not at all, she always has this look about her, a look that says at any moment she could to pull out a rifle and yell “you steal gum you die motherfucker” and I don’t even like gum.
I’ve tried to get her to warm to me, by keeping my hands in clear view so she could see no gum stealing was in progress or by presenting the exact change for my purchases, but she still gives me a “die motherfucker” look.
Maybe she does this to scare off potential gum thieves (gum can be hard to obtain) or maybe she had some sort of plastic surgery disaster that makes her that way. What ever it is, I’m going to keep trying to crack her, get her to at least smile and release the grip on her gum bandit killing rifle, if only for a second…
But if she doesn’t warm up to me soon, I’m going to steal some gum just to fuck with her.
Right o
Posted on Friday, 22nd July 2005 at 7:30pm13 Comments Ensuing
Kitta: Right o.
Sergio: Right o?
Sergio: Dude, you just lost like a gajillion points of cool.
Sergio: Right o… jeez.
Sergio: What’s next? “Tubular”?
Sergio: “Oopsie daisy”?
Kitta: Why don’t you go outside and play hide and go fuck yourself.
Sergio: HAHAHAHAHA!
Sergio: I love pissing you off.
Kitta: I love retorting.
Sergio: You write so mean when you’re pissed off.
Kitta: Only for you, baby.
Kitta: Only you.
Sergio: It warms my heart, it does.
Blogiversary
Posted on Monday, 18th July 2005 at 8:25pm21 Comments Ensuing
They grow up so fast.
One day you’re setting up their blogware and configuring their databases, the next thing you know they’re up for a bloggie and entering those difficult blogager months, during which they tell you how you’re sooo un-cool, the design you’ve given them is fugly, and that link your about to blog about was so, like, yesterday so you better not post it. Ahh blogs.
Today is my blogiversary, I’ve officially been blogging for 3 years, yet it feels like longer, much, much longer.
Thanks goes out to Rich for the hosting, GP for the ideas and my family and friends for allowing me to make fun of them online share our conversations online. And most importantly to you, yeah you, for reading my blog. Thanks. 
As a special treat for today – and only today – you may spank and feed the monkey till your hand is sore and you no longer have any food to spare.
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