Kitta.net - Don’t feed or spank the monkey

My Inner Voice

Posted on Friday, 9th April 2004 at 1:56pm
26 Comments Ensuing

I was given an Easter card this morning from my grandmother. It was a pretty little card, with bunny rabbits and eggs on the front. After about a minute or so I said “I don’t get Easter cards”, and the moment I said it the voice inside my head started to scream “WTF are you doing, she just gave you a card and you bagging it? Think quick you wanker”.

Nikita: “I mean, why have a card for it?”
Nikita’s inner voice: “That wasn’t very, good try again”
Nikita: “It’s just they have cards for everything these days!”
Nikita’s inner voice: “Do they have one that an inner voice would give to someone that won’t be quiet?”

My mother gives me a look, a look which my inner voice would probably also give me if it could, a “shut the hell up” look.

Nikita: “I saw a card a while back, it said ’sorry to hear you got fired’, that was silly”
Nikita’s inner voice: “Would you like me to help you dig that hole you’re in?”
Nikita: “Yeah…”
Nikita’s inner voice: “I do hope that means you’re done”

I do this all the time. I’m known for saying daft things right after someone gives me something, it’s a sickness. At Christmas my Aunt and Uncle came over, they gave me a book and a nice pair of handmade earrings. They were simple earrings, so I started telling her how you easy it is to make them.

Nikita: “They’re really easy to make, just get the wire and some beads and crimps here and here”
Nikita’s inner voice: “Oh no, here you go again”
Nikita’s aunt: “Oh…”
Nikita: “Yeah, really simple”
Nikita’s inner voice: “I really do wish I had a stun gun in here to shut you up at times like this”
Nikita’s aunt: “Well, they’re still a nice pair of earrings”
Nikita’s inner voice: “She thinks you hate them, say you love them, that you’d sell your soul for them”
Nikita: “Oh yes, they are”
Nikita’s inner voice: “I think it’s best to just shut up now and change the subject”
Nikita: *mumbles* “Me too”

26 Responses to “My Inner Voice”

Ed comments:

April 9th, 2004 at 2:04pm

My Dad would bust his ass finding nice things for my Mom for Christmas, Birthday,etc. Mom would respond with something like…”That’s not the one I wanted.” …Sound familiar?

PhD comments:

April 9th, 2004 at 2:50pm

How odd..i just did an entry about talking too much with my own inner voice..freaky.

J.C. comments:

April 9th, 2004 at 3:06pm

Hmmm I dont know what to say, but my inner voice is asking it self why dont you stop after you hear your inner voice or after the first weird look.

Sorge comments:

April 9th, 2004 at 3:20pm

For Kris Kingle at work last Christmas I received one of those dodgy $2 clip-on book lights despite there being a $15 minimum. We all had top go up to the tree one at a time to open the gifts and then say something about the gift, so when it was my turn I opened it up and just looked at it thinking “holy crap what a piece of shit” with a facial expression to reflect this though. I think the words that came out of my mouth were along the lines of “yeh this is great, I don’t read books” (what I meant was I don’t read because I never have time anymore). I hate to think what the purchaser was thinking, I must’ve come across like a complete and utter wanker.

The Kris Kringle gift I bought was a full size axe (like a fire axe) which was picked out by an old lady in accounts because I wrapped it in a huge box with pink paper.

Paris comments:

April 9th, 2004 at 6:37pm

hehe the earrings part is funny. Im glad i dont show any irritating facial expressions when i recieved crappy things that i dont like as presents. I think it’s due to i get many these presents every year, practice makes perfect. hehe

bobsully comments:

April 9th, 2004 at 8:16pm

Nikita: “The book looks – interesting”
Nikita’s inner voice: “wtf as a doorstop”

Psi comments:

April 9th, 2004 at 8:29pm

That post made me smile, thanks for that.

Is it not always best to say what is on your mind ? Better that than letting things build up inside, obviously though a response of thanks needs some careful thought.

Bob: I think it is the other way around, her inner voice is the voice of reason (and sense).

Bob comments:

April 9th, 2004 at 11:37pm

Point taken Psi, but maybe it does make for a better stop….

Snyke comments:

April 10th, 2004 at 12:06am

You know what an inner voice is good for? You’re never alone
I’d like to have one

Rachael comments:

April 10th, 2004 at 7:12am

My inner voice made me sell all my possessions (bar my pc) and live in the wilderness for all eternity. I should really stick up to myself.

Yeah, this is the weird sorta thing I do when left alone with it

dan comments:

April 10th, 2004 at 8:47am

Kitta, You are a beautiful bunny. I will never look at bunnies the same!!:)
Happy Easter

karolina comments:

April 10th, 2004 at 9:14am

My first time here, and I am very amused You are very nice and pretty, and your blogs are so funny!

Andy comments:

April 10th, 2004 at 11:42am

yeah, everyone has funny posts now adays. it’s nothing special. i mean, i love that post. kitta, it’s no biggie dealing with grappling with what you say vs. what you think. my old boss called it – in computer terms – his “bubble sort”. but my opinion is, it’s a very learned ability to say the right things. fortunately, web pages are a great place to say what you feel.

Carlie comments:

April 10th, 2004 at 6:19pm

oh yes, me and my big mouth, where to begin!! I just don’t think before I say something!!!

Matli! comments:

April 11th, 2004 at 12:35am

La Femme,

May I suggest adding this book to your wish list!:) Saying Thankyou

It is a lovely book to help you and your inner voice out in those tight sweemish situations.

Btw I don’t get the bunny thing either. I celebrate easter for an entirely different reason…a day where a gift above all was given to us and that is the only gift I ever need, I don’t even deserve it but I still get it. I also enjoy a nice cadburry egg once in a while though!;)

Signed,

Humble in the Jungle

shaan comments:

April 11th, 2004 at 2:05am

happy easter btw i finished bill brysons book, i loved it, gonna read it again later on

Malach comments:

April 11th, 2004 at 8:32am

Hmm, me thinks you need to remember to proof read a bit Kitta. Though the fact that you are ridiculously cute in those bunny ears makes up for typos I guess…but just barely!

Kitta comments:

April 11th, 2004 at 1:17pm

Malach, I did proof read it, as I do with all my entries. Upon reading it juts now I did notice that I was missing the word “won’t”, but that’s all. I think you forget that everyone makes typos now and again and it doesn’t mean they don’t take the time to proof read.

Shaan, I’m about half way through. I keep pushing it back when I get new books.

Malach comments:

April 11th, 2004 at 3:18pm

I could swear I juts saw something else that was out of place and confusing. I make typos too, no need to be so defensive, I’m juts teasin’ you. A good is all you need to say to put me firmly in my place. Juts settle down. (Oh man I crack myself up) juts juts juts lol…I’m a dick.

dan comments:

April 11th, 2004 at 6:48pm

Kitta, you are such a photo friendly person it is unreal. I wish that I was that photo friendly. Gotta go …. Stay beautiful:)

Dan

Dave comments:

April 11th, 2004 at 9:15pm

I really should converse with my inner voice more, can make for interesting conversation. Try writing down the conversations as you have them, and purposly have an arguement with it, makes for interesting reading when your done

Bec comments:

April 11th, 2004 at 9:25pm

LMAO! Happy Easter Babe!

Jen comments:

April 11th, 2004 at 11:12pm

I always open my mouth before i think, then my inner self helps me try and cover it up… but i just keep making it worse, lol… like you i guess :-p

ggb comments:

April 12th, 2004 at 1:11am

sup sup..yeah, I wish I was as camera friendly as Kitta *sigh*…It trips me out when I hear you guys say wanker (sorry i’m not used to hearing it =] )…welp the card thing…sometimes grandparents are so seperated from their grandchildren that they give cards…phsyically or emotionally…so they give cards to touch base (show some love) and maybe give money…and to remind you grandparent’s day is around the corner lol nah nah…well, you’ll understand when your a grand parent or you have friends with kids…or nieces or nephews…especially if they live far away…

Didn’t your momma every teach you…if you haven’t got anything good to say…don’t say it lol okay okay mouth like a truck driver….i remember…

or its the thought that counts…blah blah blah okay… i guess i used to get alot of shitty presents as a child so i’d have to grin and bear it…smile and say thank you lol… damn… kitta you are so spoiled lol nah nah

ggb comments:

April 12th, 2004 at 1:17am

how do you get those pics, kitta? do you put your cam on a timer or someone else takes the pics? lol

BTW, have you tried OCin’ your rig yet? =]

kenny comments:

April 13th, 2004 at 2:38am

i do this all the time, out loud i might add, and usually in while the person is still in the room.

i like the site btw, very bright.
happy easter!

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Kitta

Nikita (Kitta) Kashner is a 20-something year old girl from Perth, Western Australia. Currently studying to be a medical scientist. Trained blogger, jewellery designer, writer, gamer, sexy geek and monkey tamer, who spends her spare time trying to stop the Little Red Monkey from taking over the world. So far, she's stopped him 43 times... Continue?